Women are getting smaller.
The famous ones, at least. (Lindy West excluded, for uncertain reasons. David Dennison has some convincing theories on the subject here.)
The Great Ozempic-ing of Hollywood became obvious sometime during the never-ending (2024-2025) “Wicked” promotional tour.
Cynthia Erivo transformed from a normal, if not spectacularly attractive, woman into a shrunken creature of bone and muscle. Ariana Grande overshot “slim” by forty or fifty pounds. Michelle Yeoh looked equally bony.
Disclaimer One: I have no idea whether any of these women have taken Ozempic or other GLP-1s. The timing of their weight loss just so happens to coincide with the increasing popularity, affordability, and availability of GLP-1s. But Grande has been the subject of eating disorder speculation for well over a decade now, so it’s entirely possible she lost weight the old fashioned way. Already-slender celebs shooting up Ozempic always seemed like anorexic stolen valor to me. Anyway.
The Oscars were last Sunday, and the Lollipop Brigade was out in full force.
Before And After
Take a look at Maude Apatow, daughter of Leslie Mann and Judd Apatow, as compared to a few years ago.
And Jenna Ortega, Zoomette star of “Wednesday.”
And Emma Stone, who acquired a new face for this award season.
Stone garnered more attention for her look at the British Academy Film Awards, which displayed her prominent shoulderblades.
Disclaimer Two: Lest this piece come off like intrasexual sniping (though it may be too late for that), let me clarify that I think thinness is good and desirable. Some celebrities (Leonardo DiCaprio and Barbie Ferreira) have lost weight in recent months/years, and look much better for it.
The line between “heroin chic” and “should be hospitalized” is, to some extent, in the eye of the beholder (and the physician). Kate Moss was pretty thin at her peak popularity, but she read as edgy, light, and even somewhat vital. That final quality might be the (reported) cocaine use at work, admittedly.
Why is Moss attractive, while certain newly-super-skinny celebrities are not?
One X user theorized that “GLP-1 drugs like Ozempic don’t just suppress appetite. They blunt reward signaling in the brain, so people want less of everything.”
“The body gets smaller, and the spark seems to go with it.”
I don’t really buy this explanation. Probably, super-skinniness looks better on smaller framed women and younger women. Also, again, (alleged) cocaine use likely goes a long way towards making someone look “spark-y.”
But I’ll leave it to the commenters to continue the game of “hot or not.”
What Comes After Ozempic Chic?
Consider thinness through the lens of mate selection.
Once upon a time, getting skinny took some effort. Calories are cheap and abundant. Food products are precisely engineered to encourage people to keep eating them. Most people are fond of eating to begin with.
Hence, being slender was a reliable and overt signal of conscientiousness. And/or “good” genetics, in the sense that genetics influence one’s hunger, appetite, and food preferences. Conscientiousness and genetic fitness are attractive qualities in a mate.
Still, the mate selection lens doesn’t immediately reveal why “heroin chic” should be so popular. Women who are underweight are often amenorrheic and struggle to conceive children.
One solution to this puzzle: The Handicap Principle.
An underweight woman is like a peacock. Both bear an extravagant, seemingly detrimental trait (extreme thinness and an energetically costly and conspicuous tail, respectively). But only the fittest of one’s species can maintain such an extravagant trait. The tail and the thinness are costly, and therefore, reliable signals to the opposite sex: “I am biologically fit.”
Ozempic has greatly decreased the cost, and therefore, the reliability of extreme thinness as a sexual signal.
No doubt, Hollywood will take notice, if not in those terms. Celebrities like feeling special. What’s the point in being a lollipop in a sea of lollipops?
I’ve noticed some reactionary appreciation for celebrities with fortunate fat distribution and an (apparently) healthy BMI.
Waist-to-hip ratio is a great sexual signal, because it’s pretty hard to fake. Though plastic surgeons are doing their best to rectify the inequalities of nature. Since skinniness is becoming passé, I’ve brainstormed a list of qualities for women to be neurotically competitive about.
Swerve in the opposite direction and get really fat. Think about the economic implications. Demi Moore could single-handedly keep her local burger joint in business by ordering double-doubles on the regular. Savvy entrepreneurs could open ritzy leblouh (African force-feeding) camps tailored to the tastes of their A-list clients. The major flaw inherent to this idea is there’s no way to distinguish between the person who got fat on purpose, and the person who got fat because he’s too poor for Ozempic and a personal trainer. With that in mind …
Get really fat in one limb. Lug around an enormous, bloated foot or arm. The Kardashians have long opted to get really fat backsides.
Looking to the East, why not bind one’s feet into little nubs?
Looking to the Democratic Republic of the Congo, why not bind one’s head with cloth to elongate the skull?
Stretch out your neck with a bunch of golden rings.
Stretch out your lip with a clay disc.
Stretch out your earlobe with wood, bone, or heavy beads.
If all this seems like too much effort, you’re probably not cut out for the silver screen. Sorry, kid.
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Thanks for saying we’re “playing hot-or-not” down here in the comments section! I’ll take that as a compliment, lol. 🤣
You were probably being sarcastic, but please be careful when you say something like “get really fat.” Because we’re not speaking in person, it’s hard to tell if you’re being sarcastic, so someone might read that, assume you’re being serious, and then develop a fast food eating disorder, kind of like the one I have. 😐
I weigh 500 pounds, my name isn’t “Andre the Giant,” I’m not a world-class heavyweight wrestling champion and I didn’t star in the movie The Princess Bride, so again, let’s be careful when we say “get really fat.” You said something in there about “visual attractiveness.” When you’re morbidly obese, it’s still technically possible to find love, but it’s more rare and you have to meet someone who really, really knows you and appreciates you. Maybe you’re really, really smart and really, really well educated, in that situation. That’s always a plus. 👍
What I have learned the hard way is that when you’re in school, there’s a reason you have recess and P.E. class in grade K-5, there’s a reason they introduce you to sports in grade 6-8, there’s a reason they make you lift weights and play very competitive sports in high school, and there’s a reason they still encourage you to train, play sports and turn up the heat even further in college. If they’re not preparing you for military service, then I think that they’re trying to teach you that if you just do what I did and never diet or exercise again after you leave the military or finish college, then you’ll end up fat, ugly, lonely and miserable, like me. 😒
I can’t believe you just said “Sorry, kid, Hollywood ain’t your cup ‘o tea” to me. I’m offended. I take that a serious insult because until just now, I WAS planning to get a sex change and then star in place of Sharon Stone in my own remake of the 1992 film Basic Instinct. I was also planning on my movie being more profitable than Avatar. That WAS all going to happen tonight, and then you sad “sorry, but show business isn’t for you” and then you killed my dream. You just rolled up my red carpet. 😢😭
But on a slightly more serious note, I might possibly make it as Gene Hackman’s character in the next remake of the 1998 movie Enemy of the State. 🥰