State of Monday: Patriotism Makes The Huffington Post ‘Feel Yucky.’ We’ve Got Three Perfect Words In Response
When Jimmy’s Famous Seafood decided to chirp the Huffington Post on X, they kept it simple, short and aggressive
Greetings, Dear Reader,
Welp, the Winter Olympics ended in perhaps the best way possible.
Members of USA Hockey delivered an amazing upset in overtime. The Canadians collected their second-place plushies, cried and boohooed.
And Jimmy’s Famous Seafood annihilated HuffPost.
THREE WORDS HEARD ROUND THE WORLD
As a former Marine and former player of men’s sports, I consider myself a connoisseur of profanity. Of all the sports in which trash talk is routinely a part, no sport matches the pace, depth, and creativity of ice hockey.
The “chirp” they call it. It can be just a string of downright abusive language or it can be incisive, witty, cutting.
The ex-Philadelphia Flyer Claude Giroux (now on the Ottawa Senators) was known for skating by the opposing team’s bench and telling the coach to send certain players out on the ice.
“Our team is better with you out here,” he’d say of the singled out player.
Wayne Gretzky, the Great One, was known for telling defensemen who were hassling him, “you’ll tell your grandkids you played against me. No one will remember you.”
When Jimmy’s Famous Seafood decided to chirp the Huffington Post on X, they kept it simple, short and aggressive.
“Go f*** yourself.”
The reply came mere hours after the USA Hockey team had upset the Canadian team for gold to wrap up the Winter Olympics. HuffPo had been doing the standard self-loathing American routine and Jimmy’s was having none of it.
The response to Jimmy’s official social media account going gutter was overwhelmingly positive. They’ve since posted a pinned tweet saying all the members of both men’s and women’s hockey teams have a lifetime supply of crab cakes.
Conversely, Democrats who dared rejoice over America’s big win didn’t fare so well.
Maryland Democrat Gov. Wes Moore posted an image of a bald eagle preying on a Canadian goose. His replies were a complete mess.
And of course this all tracks. Hockey as a sport is overwhelmingly more right wing than any other sport in America. During Trump’s call to congratulate the team, one of the players shouted, “build a wall on the northern border!”
The phone call, along with its jubilant reception among the athletes, did not play well with liberals.
Like Heidi, there are more replies to count from liberals upset that victorious American men are having a good and patriotic time talking to Trump. And like Heidi, I highly doubt even a strong minority of these nancies have sat watching in anticipation of the opening puck drop.
They’re simply perpetually sour, self-hating, loathsome people.
Just look at these numbers for patriotism.
To liberals, America is a perpetrator and an oppressor. To conservatives, America is an enabler of greatness.
Just look at how both men’s and women’s hockey teams reacted to winning gold at the Olympics. They thanked God, thanked their teammates, thanked the country. They undoubtedly love all three.
All of this patriotism, according to HuffPo, can make some people “Feel Yucky.” The phrase is perfect because it’s utterly childish. It’s what a four-year-old with a stomach bug might say. Except it’s grown adults who blame America for every woe in the world, especially their own.
Jimmy’s response too is perfect. Their constant sulking doesn’t even deserve creativity.
Just three words and four syllables for the HuffPos of the world.
Now watch in misery as the rest of us celebrate.
Oh, and one more thing: You’re not invited.
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We live in truly dystopian times.
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Three cheers for Jimmy's! As anyone with half a brain knows, it's the limp-wristed, pronoun-wielding, sniveling lefttards at HuffPo who are "yucky," or more accurately, fucking yucky.
Incidentally, anyone else have a taste for a thigh-sized cold-water lobster tail with drawn butter?? Making myself hungry over here!