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The Men Need More Sex
Colton is 18, starting his first semester of college in the fall. Colton is also a virgin. Colton is also horny.
He has high hopes, though. He’s an optimist. He believes he will find much success with the ladies, despite never having taken a girl out on a date in high school, and land himself at least one girlfriend by the time sophomore year rolls around.
And …
As Bob Dylan says, “Time is a jet plane, it moves too fast.” By the end of junior year, Colton is still a virgin. And the one girl who he was really attracted to and actually liked him moved on because another man swooped in and before he could pull the trigger.
Tough scenes. Brutal, one might say. But a story that has become all too familiar among young men in today’s world.
Colton is now depressed. He’s spiraling. He believes that he is a massive loser because he couldn’t get laid or find a girlfriend by the time he was a senior. He cuts himself off from a small group of friends. He’s living alone in a studio off campus, watching Nick Fuentes livestreams and porn every day. His GPA is 3.91.
He graduates. Gets a job at an insurance company. Gets another studio apartment in a city of 300,000 people. Lives a 9-5 life alone, a routine punctuated by porn, Nick Fuentes, more porn, and the occasional bout of binge drinking. A desk jockey by day, doom scroller by night.
Because he cannot get a match on a dating app, let alone muster up the courage to talk with a girl in real life, he takes refuge in online forums and Discord servers filled with white ethnonationalists. Groypers. It’s one big virgin support group, where they b*tch about women being hoes, how the world is rigged against white men, and why men who get married are gay.
Yes, corners of the internet are this delusional and pathetic. The racist virgins flock toward these dark recesses, to retreat and lick their wounds, along with their fellow dorks, who could never get laid or lock down a girlfriend. Getting married? They have better odds winning the Powerball.
And therein lies Colton. He will hide in this cave for a decade, helping Nick Fuentes get rich while slowly succumbing to his poisonous message.
It can’t be a coincidence that men’s depression is correlating with the decline in adolescent sex rates. There used to be an urgency to getting laid as a young man, but that urgency has been replaced with passivity and self-pity. It has been replaced with porn and scrolling. Does that boost one’s confidence? Does that augur high self-esteem, happiness, and fulfillment?
You know the answer. Now, the question is: Can these young men be saved?
Tough to say. Some of them are beyond saving, and will suffer quietly as incels for most of their adult lives, while raging online under an anonymous account.
But …
Some will be saved – saved only by themselves. These men are in desperate need of some Boomer-style personal responsibility. They don’t need to sit around and talk about how difficult it is to get laid. They need to go out into the world, try a bunch of times, and fail a bunch of times.
I’m not saying go to a strip club, but …
No, they can be more constructive than that – some of them, at least, maybe not Colton. They can go to a bar, drink until they are seeing triple, embrace the beer goggles, and find a woman equally as desperate. They can get in shape, ask their sister to curate their online dating profile, and think of some pithy openers to get a girl off the app and sit across from them at a restaurant ASAP.
The dark wizard of takes that really piss people off, Richard Hanania, recently argued that having sex with a prostitute is better than wanking off all day:
There is a trend in society as a whole towards a retreat from meatspace and life moving into the digital. I’d rather live in a world where more young men went to prostitutes and fewer made masturbation a regular hobby. Before we thought it was possible for him to be a victim of female pedophiles, we used to talk about a young male going to a brothel and “becoming a man.” We don’t say that about the first time he pleasures himself. Actually being exposed to a woman in the flesh is a transformative experience. Moreover, visiting the brothel requires you to get out of your room. Even if the only person you see is the woman herself, you’ll probably be compelled to put on some clean clothes, brush your teeth, and learn to make eye contact. If she’s good at her job, she’ll make you feel like you know what you’re doing and increase your confidence. All of this builds good habits that are transferable to other areas of life! What does masturbation get you? Why is this the thing we embraced, while problematizing sex?
Thanks for that, Richard.
He’s right, though. We are transferring meatspace experience into the digital world. And it’s a bad trend, because it’s so inhuman, so unnatural. We are animals, after all, and we are as much a part of nature as the frantic little squirrels scurrying up the tree. Squirrels need to mate, and so do we.
Personally, I think prostitution is wrong. If you have to resort to real-life sex workers to get laid, you have a problem. But many young men in our society do have a serious problem.
So, I will leave it at this …
If Colton flew out to Las Vegas with an old college bud for his 30th birthday, nuked some brain cells in a three-day bender, lost $392 at a Caesar’s Palace black jack table, and capped off the night by having his first-ever dalliance with a tatted up hooker, I think he would be happier.
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